Edan Chang

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2011-01-18T07:14:00.000+08:00

It was my first day of school in Setapak campus, the first day of schooling for degree. I was excited actually but at the end of the day, personal stuff ruined up my mood. The campus was not a big one compare to Kampar campus. It is small, old but it is compact. XD. I saw a lot of familiar faces inside the campus. Maybe they were my secondary schoolmates and tuition center classmate. Several things I hate about this campus are the classroom. The table is so dusty and not comfortable compare to the new campus. Then talk about the cafeteria, only 3 stalls are available for the whole school? And the management indeed bad. UTAR, time to renovate your campus in Setapak and 'renovate' your staff too.

I got some emotional swing due to some personal problem that unable to solve in this short period time. I just pray hard that those life I went through does not fall on me again. God had tested me and I passed. Hope it will be alright soon. Life is not easy in this Earth and I have to survive for myself and those who look down on me before. I going to shut your mouth off one day.

Time to go to school. Although the weather today seem cold, I have to walk a long distance again. Enjoy the breezy day.

Off to school,
Love

New room and new life

2011-01-15T08:15:00.000+08:00

I found one room around my study area. At first this condominium is full of dirt, even the living room in this unit. I used 2 days to clean up my room as this area full of dust, so I have to bring my air purifier to this room. And the facilities are not in good condition. However, after few days of staying here, I start to love this room. I love the environment as it is quiet and I can do my study here. The big room that fulfill my privacy and allow me to do whatever I want in room. The night view here is awesome, I can stare at the night view of downtown when I am bored. The night scene of Kuala Lumpur is not that bad too. However I still want to have a look on Melbourne one. :D

I am going to the new campus since I am starting up my undergraduate program. The campus is located at Setapak. It is not that near to my school as I have to walk a distance to catch a bus and walk a distance to school at the bus stop point. I went to the school at the first day of orientation, I cannot come out one word to describe the campus here, maybe suck. Due to the improper organisation and they should improve their management and their interpersonal skill. One in a sudden, I thinking of how nice and beautiful of Kampar campus is. Although it is in rural area, its facilities is better and more complete compare to the Setapak one. However, the campus in Kampar going to FALL. XD

I start to miss some of my classmate in Kampar, they treating me so nice and humble, like one family. And I am always the eldest one. Hope that they are doing fine there and do well for their studies. Hopefully I can get a batch of friend in the coming day in campus.

Off to see the sunrise of KL.
I love you.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-25T20:53:00.000+08:00

It is a special day for me as I am sitting at my home, not outing to anywhere for this year Christmas celebration. Do people ask me for outing, vacation and even go to town for experience the joy. As my final getting nearer and nearer, I am stressful. The stress able to turn the day to night. (I am just kidding but the way) I admit that I did not put a lot of effort on my coursework and that is why I still have not achieve my goal this semester. Time for me to do a little bit for my result for this final semester of Foundation. Study study study.

I wish I can get a small celebration in town when I am back to KL with my close one. Christmas party, New Year party or even my birthday, maybe. Long time I never celebrate my big day. I still remember the last time I celebrate my birthday when I was in primary school. Looking forward on this year birthday party in KL with Joey Lee. Joey, as I promised you, we will exchange our present. Excited. Then we continue our joy with alcohol. Yeah~

Still a day to go before my first paper starts. Am feeling stress. Time to back to my studies. Ciao.

Rumors

2010-12-18T23:08:00.000+08:00

It is just like spore, it spreads everywhere with the help of wind and anywhere could be their place of growing.

Rumors, an unverified statement or explanation circulating from one to another which is doubtful accuracy. Is like a television series in United State, Gossip Girl, the gossip and talk of returning of Serena from mysterious stay of boarding school. All happening in a school and even city in New York. And I am like the Serena in the drama.

It ruined up my relationships and my reputation as well. Well, for me those talk on me is seriously irritating but funny. There is no evidence to prove those gossip valid and some of them is fabricating themselves. I do not know how to respond to those rumors sometimes. Ridiculous maybe? LMAO. And I believe that all these will follow me until the day I finish my undergraduate. Just try my best to protect myself and my close one.

Whatever it is, just fuck and back off. Speak out to me with evidence before the rumors is true. Clarification that I made now is useless I think. Therefore, being hushed is the best way for shielding myself I guess.

Regain little blogging mode

2010-12-17T12:29:00.000+08:00

Oh gosh, it is been a long time I never come to this site. Soon, I will get back to my blogging mode.

This is the last semester for my Foundation program in UTAR, hopefully. And the worst thing is, I having my final during my Christmas and birthday. Gosh, it ruined up my plans. Initially, I planning to celebrate Christmas and my birthday at somewhere else (not at Kampar, indeed). Now I have to study as 2 days after Christmas is my first paper. 5 paper in one row, back to back, However management set me a holiday during my birthday, but the next day they squeezed with 2 papers.

Study study study, forced to postpone my celebration of turning 20. Whatever. I just do not want to screw up my finals and ask to stay another semester for retaking those failed subject (touchwood). I do not want to delay my time of graduation as I am later then others and I can't wait to step in this society.

Again

2010-09-19T17:38:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow going to have my last semester for my foundation studies. And it going to be more tougher than previous semesters, I think. Second semester is like a disaster for me. Have been through so many obstacles, not only in studies, but in relationship and friendship too. Am now going to concentrate more on studies in my third semester and hopefully can maintain my CGPA more than 3.00 upon completion of my foundation.

Am enjoying her song, 田馥甄 - 寂寞寂寞就好 (Hebe from S.H.E.), the lyrics is so meaningful. Somehow it can related to my life last few years. This the link of the song, enjoy it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DyFIzKYQQYE&feature=related

Good luck for my coming semester and good luck on my life too.

PS: Good luck to you too, on your working.

Monday Eve

2010-08-16T00:07:00.000+08:00

Today I have to get enough rest to survive on the following weeks. Next two weeks I gonna stress myself out as the sketch presentation and final are coming. I have to give all my best this time as I have to score a better result than last semester. A 20 minutes sketch, is a comedy sketch that might take me few days to get all of the tools and costume. Final, 5 papers that would kill me, especially Thermodynamics and Organic Chemistry, they are tougher than what I expected at the early of the semester. Really have to work hard on it.

Hope I wouldn't stress out like the threat above, I don't wish to break off and DIE. LoL.

Am a big fans of Beyonce Knowles and I still collecting her solo albums. I have all of her album but I just miss out her 1st solo album - Dangerously in Love. I am craving for it, can anyone sell it to me? Is hard to get it from the market now as it is like 7 years ago when she first launched worldwide. I going to collect Destiny's Child albums as well while searching that album. According to BBC news and World Music Awards, Destiny's Child is the world best selling female group of all time with 50 millions copy with 4 albums. While Beyonce is the legend, the queen of the music industry. With 16 Grammys (3rd most Grammy Awards won by female artist) and she earned 6 Grammys in one days, breaking the record for the most Grammy Award won by a female artist in one night. Do you know that Beyonce Knowles started to sing at the age of 8? She is awesome, and of course Destiny's Child. Can't wait for her next album.

Ciao,
ETC
Xoxo...

(Where can I get the Dangerously in Love album? Or who can sell it to me?)

Transforming

2010-08-13T22:09:00.000+08:00

I went to Ipoh to get my daily facial cleanser today. I used to use Lab Series as it is specially designed for men. Unfortunately it doesn't work for me. My face still the same, an angel with stain on his face. LMAO.

I changed all of my stuff from Lab Series to Kose from Japan.

The sales girl gave me a promotion of free facial and free deep cleaning mask. Wow, it really work on my face. But the process is damn torturing. Can you imagine a needle poke over your skin and squeeze out the impurities? Is freaking pain. I have to bear it in order to get a softer skin. >,< Is nightmare but I just like the result.

I had made another appointment to do a facial treatment again. I going to have a nice face in future. ^^

Get more sleep,

ETC

In one sudden

2010-08-08T10:55:00.000+08:00

Hanging out with one of my UTAR BFF yesterday in Ipoh, the environment is good for us to chat about when we were chilling in Starbuck before we heading to McD. Her tears was dropping when she talking on her first love in her college life. And I hate this part as I do not know how to comfort people with appropriate words. But I tried my best to make her to know, I just wanted her to let go as soon as she can. Bless her.

One of my friend in had admitted to hospital for operation and psychological for her illness. She such a pretty girl, with a lovable personality, kind heart and smart thinker. I sincerely hope she will be fine. Fully recover and send good news to me. "We will pray for you, may God bless you too."

Surprisingly, I dropped the first tear for you after we breakup. I wondering why I am so weak as matter had happened long time ago. I think it was fading away in my life, but it is not. It still in my heart, the memories is like the roots of tree, immobile and forever is there. Although the tear dropped with happiness, it is a bad memories for me, whatever have done is done to me. And I hurt a lot seriously. Like a cracked mirror, once cracked forever the line is there. Hope you are doing fine there.

Off to school library
ETC

...

2010-07-25T23:22:00.000+08:00

This week, I am free from test and presentation. I feel lighter now as last few weekd were my nightmare of test, assignments and report (UTAR = University of Test Assignments and Report... Lol) However, I asked to come out one sketch for my group presentation for Communication Skill. It is hard for me as I am a perfectionist and I want a good and comedy sketch. Someone out there help me, please. Maybe my sketch based on some popular fairy tales but I will change the characters and the incident happened in the story. Eg, Juliet singing "Love Story" by Taylor Swift to Romeo, Snow white kills the witch. Haha. It is creative, but you know what? If this sketch works, I have to wear DRESS, in other words, I will acts as a female in the presentation. Die me. >,<

The coming Tuesday, I have to complete a task, a disgusting yet horrifying task, which is dissection of rat for my Biology lab practical. Eww, it is so disgusting as we have to cut the skin of the rat and observe the organ of the rat. It is so cruel as we going to kill a rat. It is so "Kao Wet". Eww eww eww. Please let me go, Ms Tang. I am not a Bio student. I dont want do that practical. But luckily, one of my classmate willing to do that for me. But I still fell very sorry for those rat. I think I going to starve for that day. T T Bless me and the rat.

I am craving for nice foods now. I wanted to go back to KL so badly as I can get them more easily. I want pork noodles and Uncle Senf at SS15, Subang Jaya. I want TGI Friday, Delicious,Chilis, Bumba Gump, Nando's, Madam Kuan, and the list go on and on. I want Snowflake, Hageen Daaz, Big Apple, J.Co, Krispy Creame, Alexis and the list still go on and on too. I want Hoegaarden for sure, thats what I craving for so long after I am studying in Kampar. And also The Library, the best chilling place with friends and alcohol. ^^ Kampar, a dead city, even do not have Mcd. But they going to have one here and i think they open after I leave. Sob sob.

Guys, must try the GCB burger from Mvd. It is so nice and I drive purposely to Ipoh for that burger, for twice. It is simply awesome with a lot of chili sauce. Must try it. (OMG, I am hungry now.)

I am so lost now. I think I told one of my BFF just now. I wondering why God created me with this kind of mind. Mixed feeling. Should I go according my feeling that maybe will hurts my F&F and regret whole life? Or should I go according to their wish that somehow will betray my feeling? Complicating issue and feeling again. >,<

Off for shower then mask...
ETC (Edan Travis Chang) <3

Complicated

2010-07-24T02:46:00.000+08:00

It's been a while I am not access to blogspot.com, not only mine but others as well. I do not have such time and intention to go to blog and read blogs one by one. Sorry for being M.I.A for months because I have to concentrate on my studies and my personal life.

It is an interesting and challenging in this new semester. I met a lot of friends through prom night and campus occasions. I get into know a batch of 4 BFFs in this town, and I glad that they support me all the way from school to my life. Thanks babes. And I score better in all the test than previous semester, I get a B and higher than that. Is a improvement for me especially for Biology (I hate Biology, I hate reading). And I went to gym for building muscle, create lines for my body. ^^ However, something bad happened to me on the beginning of the semester. Backstabber talk bad about me, but I was standing out and the conflicts solved. "Do not jealous on other, be yourself. Someday you will be like me."

But my personal life, more miserable.First is my love life, I have been cheated by love ones (Is okay, let go). Secondly, I am a heart-breaker, I do not accept others' love as I prefer single. Feeling good and freed when I am single, but lonely. Thirdly, although I prefer single, someone just changed my mind when a buddy walking into my heart. Smart, charm, warm and sweet are the suitable words to describe her. She just the right one that fulfill all of my requirement for my checklist. But worst to worst, it is just an illusion for her as she just breakup with her BF and it is hurt for me, until now. But I have to let go as they are together now. Sincerely wish them luck in their relationship.

The most miserable things in my life - I so-called lost 3 buddies in my life. They are part of my life. We share, we laugh, we gossip and ...
"Time for me to let go, wish you luck in your relationship. Just give me some times."
"Is not your fault, both of us have to take the responsibility. Time will tell everything. Hope you are doing fine there."
"Sincerely I have to say sorry to you. I shouldn't do that to you cause you are my friend. Hearty apologize."
Nothing else I can help in gaining back. Although I shouldn't say sorry to all of them, all the people just point their fingers at me. What else I can do? I rather to be the bad guys than ruining up two relationships. Let give us some time for it.

"Smash Into You" by Beyonce Knowles from I am ... Sasha Fierce. Try to listen to this song. Simply awesome.

Semester 1

2010-05-23T21:42:00.001+08:00

I finished my 1st Trimester in UTAR. It was fun and new to me as I met some of the new friends in UTAR. I met a group of people that "pia" with me for my final (study hard for final). We spent almost 2.5 weeks earlier before the final starts. And the result is out, I get 3.33 for my 1st Trimester. it is quite good but not hitting my target yet, seriously, I am not satisfied and sad with it. What to do? Just do my best for the coming 2 trimester. >,<

I went back to KL for 5 times in 4 weeks, LOLX... I miss my KL home badly... >,<... First time is back for fetching my mother at LCCT. Second time is back after dropping my sister at Kampar. Third time is back for SHOPPING. Fourth time is back for BABES, FRIENDS, SHOPPING and TAYLOR'S LAKESIDE. Fifth time is back for BABES and SHOPPING.

I met a lot of my old school friends, friends and my soulmates. Bubba Gump, Chili, TGI Friday, Madam Kuan, Uncle Seng, Haagen Daaz, Pepper Lunch,Tony Roma, Delicious, Baskin Robin, Nando's... OMG, the food is damn nice wei... Hope to get them again when get back to KL... I miss the Fondue from Haagen Daaz and the Jack Daniel's Burger from TGI Friday, is damn awesome pawsome edansome... Mama Mia~~~

I went to Batu Caves with two of my friends in M'sia and S'pore... They are awesome... ^^

I went to Taylor's Lakeside Campus as I fetch my friend out from the school... The campus is awesome... ^^
I went out with my babes... They are awesome... ^^
I own a brand new iPod... It is awesome... ^^
I went to drink with my brother and his friends... They are awesome... ^^
I went to dinner with my friends... They are awesome... ^^
Whole semester break full with AWESOME... Mama Mia... ^^

I love to shop at KLCC after this trimester break... Fred Perry is the most favorite shop for me right now. I bought one shoes and 2 bags from there. Is damn cheap, freaking cheap. And I am VIP for Fred Perry now... >,<... KLCC got Paul Smiths which I one wallet from there... RM1699, OMG is seriously expensive but diva... Lolx... And The Body Shop there... I love to go there for window shopping and Xoxo... Haha... And I HATE PAVILION... Don't know why, I just hate it...

One of my babe is flying to US soon for her further degree... I going to miss her a lot and wish her good luck in her coming challenges in US... And her relationships too... <3... I hope I can farewell her in the coming weekends of June... Pray Pray Hope Hope Pray...

1 more weeks for counting down my 2nd trimester... I heard Thermodynamics is hard and I may screw it up... No no no, I won't... I will fight for it, for my CGPA... Hmph...

Sign off for Facebook...

P/S: I hate you, but I love you... I can't stop thinking of you...

Back to Wonderland

2010-05-03T21:14:00.000+08:00

I went back to KL on Friday night, thats making me excited. I can meet all of my friends, my brothers, my families and I can shop for sure. But after reaching here for three days, it seems like the definition of KL have changed. Am no more find there are any joyful or exciting incident and people thats light up my day in KL. I was so boring here and even now, I am blogging at home. What a bored day. ><

I miss the people who caring me a lot when I studying in KL, they are awesome. However, we have some gap between us, I think. Hope that my assumption is always wrong, I love you all. I miss the shop here in KL. Snowflakes, Big Apple, Hageen Dasz, Uncle Sang in SS14 Subang and of course H20. And I want to shop in KL but nobody company me. I NEED PEOPLE. And I miss someone who do not have much time for me, I having bad time here, and I need your shoulder. I need more people seriously as I miss it so much. Club? I will go there someday, with my friends.

I hate KL traffic, damn it. I trapped in traffic jam for almost 2 hours as I go from MidValley to Jalan Maharajalela to fetch my father and we took 2 hours to get back home. Lolx. It made me exhausted. I drove from Cheras to LCCT in the morning. The LCCT to KL then Damansara and heading back to Cheras. Then go to Damansara again and dropped my father in KL and I drive back to Cheras again. >.< Is like WALAO for me. I am exhausted and I need rest. First time ever I feel tired because of driving, but I will never hate driving cause it is FREEDOM.

Sign off for dinner + supper with dad.

Good night.

P/S : Although working schedule is full, remember to take care your health. hopefully can meet you after your task in HK.

First Semester in UTAR

2010-04-30T16:34:00.000+08:00

Let me count, is like half month I never update anything in my blog and even my Facebook. I was busying with my exam last two weeks. Finally, the exam is over and I am exhausting seriously. I was studying from morning till night in school library and continue my studies at home and friends' house till midnight. Am I hardworking enough? Please never say YES, because I never do my revision before exam and by the time the final exam come to the corner, I was panic and dying for cover all the lecture had taught. It not gonna happen in next semester, PROMISE, I will go study in library during weekends.

The papers were hard seriously. Now I am worry about my result. Will it be 3.7, 3.3, 3.0, 2.0? Shit, making my life so miserable. Damn it. Anyway, thank you to ShuHui, Sotong Girl and Ivan, my "studymates" , friends in UTAR. Happy that meeting you all. Enjoy your holiday. I will inform you all whether our trip can make it or not. ^^.

Holiday~~~. The best part for this moments. I going back to Kuala Lumpur, the land of sin. Lolx. I planned for my one month holiday. ^^
1) KL pit stop - KL friends, Subang's soulmates, shopping, sleep, movie, nightlife and Jennifer. ^^
2) Melaka - Makan makan makan...
3) Singapore - Find my mother during Mother's Day in S'pore and friends as well.
4) Peneng - Makan makan makan...
Lots more. I think thats the major one. But I think time is not allow me to do so. Haih. Hope can do it all in one shot. I bored till die if I am locked here. Outing is my life.

Sign off for nap, never sleep well for two weeks due to stress of exam... Ciao~~~
PS : I am coming now. ^^
PS' : I read it.

Contact lens

2010-04-15T00:53:00.000+08:00

I just receive the new contact lens from Babe Jodie this morning. The 3 new contact lens are awesome man. Especially the purple one, the pattern they using is so outstanding and unique, I think I not dare to wear it. Lolx. I have 2 pairs of black, 1 pairs of blue, 1 pairs of grey, 1 pair of green and 1 pair of purple now. Am I too over about it? I can't try it when I first saw them as I am too tired these few day. However I will update some photo of it ASAP. Chill people.

I doze off twice in front of webcam just now. My friend just laugh at me. Haih. Maybe the weather killing me? Or I am too stress of my studies? Or I cannot focus as I open my Biology and Physics textbooks? I just feel tired. And the final exam left almost 12 days, and I haven't prepare for it. Damn it, my CGPA going to be lower down by several subjects like Physics and Biology. My coursework mark for Biology just 33.7 over 50. Still far away from my GPA 4.0, I think I should aim lower now, GPA 3.5 for Biology. (Full with tears) More coursework marks will coming out soon that going to tackle my confident. Shit, seriously I hate this part, this kind of feeling.

Have to prepare for my exam seriously. Then only I can enjoy my holiday with maximum happiness. Maybe I will turn off my PC from tomorrow onwards. Or I just on MSN that allow people to contact me? I need concentrate now, seriously.

Sign off for continue my revision
P/S: You better seek medical attention before you leave to Hong Kong, okay? Take care.

Tasteless Cheesecake

2010-04-12T23:48:00.000+08:00

Chemistry class is replaced by Mr Ng as Ms Tan is on leave for few day. The joker of the day, Mr Ng, come in with a very weird bag. He called it handbag. OMG. Where is he from? Mars? Lolx. I was laughing non stop for the 1 hour session and not paying attention at all. i was like focusing on taking the picture of his awesome handbag. This is it.

I totally LMAO for it. Is a paper bag. Not even a paper bag, is a box of Acer monitor. Lolx. He said save environment. Really? Save money for save environment? The first one more suitable to him. Again, his mouth non-stop, extended our time for half an hour, wondering his mouth not tired at all. This Wednesday he asking us to go to his house for dinner again. He has other intention behind it. I not going to detail, is very sensitive regarding religious issue.

Cheesecake will turn me on seriously. I love cake, especially cheesecake. The enjoyment is like infinity and long lasting. I get one piece of it from my friend, is a Marble Cheesecake. However, I was not so enjoy it since we fought last night. I don't know what the hack the problems are and whats the problems hanging out with other friends. We fought for small matter. I keep bearing it. Seriously I pissed off when you drop my phone, I hate it. The Cheesecake is tasteless now is not meaningful. I asked Kelvin out for chilling, but he is not free. Therefore, sleeping is the nice one. I hate immature action. That silly steps taken. You not gonna get the "pity-ness" from people, but you will hear some laughing behind, seriously. Do and speak after you think, it may reduce a lot of friction.

Something exposed to the air. I let go myself to them. I was so happy when they support me. Thank you. And you have to be more careful when dealing with love thingy, is very complicated as you cannot imagine it. Good luck in your relationship. Next semester I will enter gym room in UTAR as i purposely arrange the time table for gym. Hope can build a nice body, but not hunks please. Hunk is disgusting, ew. Although is a nightmare for me, I have to face it right? So I ask one friend of mine come with me. Thanks first.

Miss Diana a.k.a. Miss Dan, thanks for spending your night with me. I gain something after our conversation. I know I still can crap after trapping in this village, bored place. Eventually I wanted to study, but it was awesome have a nice chat with you. Miss it. Anyway, I will go Melbourne one day if I got chance. (Don't doting on it please)

Well, is time for study.

Sign off

P/S: Not Applicable (Lolx. Will you angry with it? LMAO.)

Nice breakfast

2010-04-11T22:37:00.000+08:00

What a nice day. People said a nice breakfast can make your day "nice". Yes, its work. Today I had my breakfast in Ipoh with Eric, friend from UTAR. We either go into Old Town White Coffee for Nasi Lemak and white coffee or McD for the breakfast. Finally we walked into McD for the breakfast. What the hack, I miss it so much. The last time I ate the MMcD breakfast is the day I having my Microeconomics exam in Taylor's, is like 1 year ago. OMG, I finally grab one meal after desperate for so long time.

This is my meal.

People are looking at me when I capture the photo of a non-living thing in McD. They think that I mad. Yes, I mad, so how? Are you going to fuck me up? Blek. (Sorry Eric, make you so embarrass this morning. Actually got people looking at us and you are the innocent one. >< ) Tata. When my meal is opened.

I miss the hash brown. And I eat it in very Sean's way. Haha. By using a tissue paper to absorb the excessive oil. Eric was shocked once he saw the amount of oil the tissue paper absorb. However, the oil is inside his stomach. Die faster. Lolx. I am so enjoying with the food and the people. We shared a lot of things, and I am like psychologist for him just now. Hope you know what am I talking about. ^^

Again, I went to Tesco kampar to buy my second pints of Haagen Dazs' coffee flavor. What a nice ice-cream. Damn it, I am addicted to it. Noel, you better don't break your promise as you said you gonna bring me to TGI Friday for that ice-cream. Haha. TGI Friday, I coming~~~. Mr Noel, just save up some money for my stomach. Lolx.

Loyal + Original + Vista + Eternal = Love. Love someone is a very easy thing, but love each other is a very hard and yet very rare. Is a very valuable and not to be wasted ever. Just like eating an ice-cream, the happiness is not long lasting but we have to make it long lasting by grabbing another pint of ice-cream. Loyal, we have to loyal to the love ones as he or she is our special one that we have to remaining maximum faithful and supporting each other. Original, keep the origin of love, the point from a couple love each other and till forever. Vista, human are imperfect, although your love ones have weakness, we have to see the "beautiful side" of your love one and cover the "ugly" with the "beautiful side" of your love ones. Eternal, love is about forever, not like playing a game, do not give up easily. Please love your LOVE, do not give up easily.

Sign off with full of LOVE

P/S: Wear a mask when you have convention in Hong Kong, do you dare? Hehe. LOVE you.

Hot and Cold

2010-04-10T23:10:00.000+08:00

What a hot weather today. Fuck Kampar. Sweating within 5 minutes after out from bathroom, killing me. Not comfortable for study, not comfortable for sleep even lying on bed. Initially I opened my Biology textbook, though I want to study at least one chapter. However the bloody hotness turn me off when I open up the book. then I go bath again and have a nap before going out to do something.

I found out the cure for this "sickness" - Ice Cream. What the fuck, I am in heaven just now. Holding one box of Haagen Dazs that cost me RM30.90 from Tesco and eating it. What a enjoyment is that, is even nicer than having aircond in room or being hug. Long lasting happy, LOLX. Long time do not have this happiness since H20 in Subang is closed, a place that bitches and I often hanging out after class in Taylor's. I miss that moment.

I need some support now, emotional and mental support. I do not have the motivation for my final. I still very chill + relax = chillax in my Week 12. Oh gosh, three more weeks and theres no study week for me. But I think I can made it since I went for the devil training in Taylor's ADP that even more stress then UTAR, seriously. Haih, miss ADP now. It is so happening in ADP. I love the feeling there. Proud of myself that I went to the highest recognize University College in Malaysia. I learnt how to communicate with people, how to speak English, how to cope big stress, how to handle problems like studies, friendships, loves, financials, family and myself. Thanks American Transfer Degree Program of Taylor's University College, I will go back to study in your lake side campus one day. For sure I want to study there, maybe get my second Degree there?

Recently I found one scholarship for Actuarial Science, but I not dare to submit the form. I scare that the same thing happened again. Study half way, not enough money then stop. because they only sponsor me with RM30,000 annually, extra have to pay myself. I don't know whether my parents can afford the extra expenses or not. therefore I do not send the form out till now. I still thinking, my parents still thinking. I have a big dream, I want to study in oversea and get my Master of Actuarial Science either in US or Aussie. But now seems like everything is impossible, In this realistic world, materialism is the main power. If you have money, you are the winner in the world. But I never blame myself or my parents brought me here, at least I learn something that the millionaire do not experience before, I appreciate it.

Sign off with Ice-cream later

Ciao~

P/S: I love you. Muacksss.

Footprints in my sand

2010-04-10T01:47:00.001+08:00

I found my slipper finally. Is under the bed. One of the dog took my slipper away and bite under the bed. LMAO. Is totally in pieces and I need a new one now. T T. Fuck that dog. FU. Slippers, shoes, clothes, and jeans are my next target. As well as prom dress, formal wear and bag of course. Damn it, gonna save it from now on. For my outfits and vacation as well.

Staring at the calender, as my exam is coming nearer and nearer, and I feel the nervous inside, but I never take up my steps - studying. I'm still playing with my networking applications and I wasted most of my time on online instead of studying for final. Damn it. Have to start later or tomorrow for fulfill someone wish.

I wondering that Beyonce Knowles a.k.a. really pregnant? She claimed that she loves baby when she saw her younger sister having a great time with her baby. And in some interview, she said she is happy that Jay-z put the ring on her and she wish to have a baby with Jay-z. It is good that Beyonce had pregnant as she will becoming more and more lovely and caring. However, I scare that once they got a baby, she going to stop her career and become a housewife for taking care their children. Or maybe she go to backstage that might not be so stress for her. Or maybe she open up a recording label to train new singer to become Fierce like her. We don't know. But what I know is, I inspired by her Sasha Fierce. I love you, Beyonce Knowles. (Why I am ... Tour do not have a DVD? It is awesome concert, better than The Beyonce Experience Tour.)

I feel so empty just now. Once a while, the feeling of emptiness strike me and made me break down sometimes. I thinking, what have I done for the last 19 years? Sometime when I look back, I feel mixed. happy, sad, cheer, frustrated, easy, harsh, sweet, tough, smile, tears. My life full of conflicts. Should I appreciate it or hate myself? I need real friend, that know me well physically and emotionally. Is only one person in this world can have the title. I wish you are here just now, seriously. I miss our time we hanging out last time and its been for a while, a year maybe we did not meet each other. I miss you so in sudden. (Footprints in my sand by Leona Lewis, specially dedicate for you. ^^)

I want go gym, desperately. I have to sharpen up for my outlooks, look nicer and better with clothes and as well as nude too. One of my friend (I don't wanna mention name out. If I do so, I will get bite. Ouch~), we have planning for gym since Feb till now. Lolx. I need flesh and some muscle now. Please, no more skinny.

Sign off with HUNGRY MODE

P/S: Miss you here, sleep tight and goodnight.

Chillaxing

2010-04-08T22:30:00.000+08:00

Physics test, you failed me. So sad. The questions are hard but I still can solve half of the questions, not bad not bad. (But it doesn't mean that I will get the correct one. Sometime apply the correct equation but didn't get the answer. Thats why I am so fuck up by Physics.) That means my scarifying for one night is worth it. But no last minutes study, is suffering. It make me sick, I just have a simple sandwich for my brunch, no appetite for eating. Once reach home, straight away lying on bed after bath. Damn tired, exhausted.

After completed so many task this few week, now have to focus on my final. Is around the corner, probably 17 days more. Is not enough for me if I study last minutes again. I remember one quote by Sarah Chong, one of my bitch. She said, "平时不屌书,现在给书屌" (You didn't fuck the book right now, you will fucked by the book later on.) Awesome quote by Adibah. Lolx. I miss her so much, is she having good time there? Time to backup my previous topic in order fulfill my requirement.

One of my slippers is MIA, missing in action. Fuck up. No slipper for me and I was like jumping back from others house back to my house with only one leg. Pity me. Fuck that dog. (I don't know which one eat my slipper but I sure is one of the dog there.) T T

I want go back to KL now as I can hang out with my friends there. I miss the air in KL. Miss the environment. I want go The Library again, best chilling place. 69 in Time Square for fortune telling and tarots. Blue bar for drinking. TGI Friday and Big Apple. ^^ Saving money for Topshop and others again. Trying to be fresh for next semester. Or stylo? Planning to go to S'pore, Malacca and Penang for semester break. Can't wait it anymore.

I am so bored as I trapped in home now. Outing, anyone?
XoXo

Sign off for studies
Chillaxing

Well done

2010-04-08T07:38:00.000+08:00

"I can see yours effort in the slide and it is good. You guys did a good job. Marvelous." (Ms Puspha) Is real, that line is out from her mouth. She is those kind of people seldom give compliments in this way, either she shoot you indirectly or she talks bad about your work. (Don't let her see please) Lolx. Partners and I did a great job for the lecture presentation. Finally I can relax for 1 minute for the presentation of entire semester. However after 1 minute, I have to come back to reality world - Physics test. Ouch. It is killing me. I never sleep for day. I keep awake for my revision as I never open the book for the last few lectures and now I am suffering. I tried to condense my study scoop for study 4 chapters in one midnight. OMG, I surprise that I am still awake due to 5 cup of coffee within 10 hours. I going to addicted to it, Holy shit. Anyway, I finished studying it and now is around 06:19am, just allow me chill and crap in my blog. ^^

I viewed back the recording of my presentation. Is a good show. However, in the last part, I suddenly forget what I want to said. It just spoiled the whole presentation, is like a black dot on a white paper. Sorry dude. And one more thing, my legs damn long~~~. maybe I should go for XxXxX. Haha. But have to gain more flesh first. Eat Eat Eat. Aka Aka Eating, LMAO.

Although I am "well done" in my studies so far, am I very "well done" in my life. I do not know. My life is miserable. Is like an economic cycle, I been through my life "peak" and "recession" process. But I appreciate that God sent me to this world, to my mum's little stomach. ^^ It is harsh and tough sometimes, but I view thing with different side. Think positivity, its making my life more interesting. At least I learnt more than most of the people and I taking the advantage of it. Thanks to myself for making me to Sasha Fierce.

Before I sign off, I would like to use my blog to curse some people out there. Although I know cursing others is not good, I am so pissed off about that and ya, I need to curse. Please appreciate what you have, and beware of your mouth. taking advantage off people and not saying thank you, fuck you all bitches. Son and daughter of slut.

Sign off to school.
(Good luck to myself for Physics ^^)

Oh my God

2010-04-07T01:17:00.000+08:00

First OMG

This week, still I fuck up. I have to complete so many tasks in this week and the following weeks before final. Left 2 weeks, and I haven't start revision for all subject. How I going to handle that? No study week for me and I think I going to heaven especially my Biology and Physics. However, the re-test of Physics, surprisingly I did quite well, much much better than the first test. And my lab reports score almost full marks where I can pick up my confident back for this subject. Keep it on Edan Travis. Opps, is Travis Fierce.

Second OMG

Something funny happened in campus today. I am totally laugh my ass off when I recall back. LMAO. I was fetching back my friend A back to her room to take her stuff. And girl B called me. She asked me to go to computer lab in Block B for printing as her report is in my pendrive for our class at 1400 (2.00pm). Then when I parked my car and walking to block B, it was 1405 already. Somemore I met my lecture when I heading to block B while he is heading to block D for our class. I am like "OMG, I going to be late for class. Shit." Then I tried to print the stuff ASAP. God not bless me, 5 PCs we have tried, the PCs is failure to detect my pendrive and 2 PCs do not support 07' Words format. Holy shit, it was 1420 and we decided to go back to class as we late for the class for almost half and hour and B just copy and paste with my format I print extra for her. When I reach my class in block D, it was 1430 and I keep searching my bag on the rack. My bag was not there. OMG~~~!!! I left my bag at block B's PC lab. I walked back to block B and heading back to block D again. I was like sweating, like bathing. I was late for the class for 45 minutes. By the time I entered the class, classmates started to laugh at me. "What happened to you? (With smile and laugh)" So embarrass. LMAO. Even lecturer said, "Edan, you late for class right? Signed your attendance? (With smile also)" Lolx.

Third OMG

Tomorrow girl A and me going to face something challenging. She going to Ipoh for her JPA interview. Good luck to her. And me, pity me, have to do presentation in front of a lecture hall. T T sobing. It is tough for me as I get nervous easily. We do not have enough time for prepare the slide as Ms just give us 4 days to do our slides. Although tomorrow I going to wear a formal wear for presentation, I will still nervous like hell and hope not shaking while holding the mic.

Fourth OMG

One of my best friend get dumped by his boyfriend. I know it is harsh for you as you seldom fall in love so easily. Just learn some lessons and see thing from positive side, hope you are okay now, and he doing the right choice. If you are single, we both can attend single parties and enjoy. ^ ^

And one of my friend is fighting with his loves one. Don't so upset on your baby, he will know your worries one days. Remember to treat Almo good, feed him with cheesecake.

Another one get attached, maybe. Just be careful before and when in relationship. Anything just ask me. I am tool free consultant. Awesome?

Others two of them going to leave to US for their Degree. I going to miss you all like hell, babes.

P/S: I miss you here badly. Want to hear your voice before I go to bed. Good night.

Sign off.

Travis Fierce

2010-04-04T10:50:00.001+08:00

This week I had observed so many objects, a lot of matter happened around me. One of my friend have a sudden mood changes. Why this world is so unfair? Those who not deserve for love can get their "unwell" love, however those who deserve for love does not have their true love. What the fuck is that? Just hope you are okay now. I always love you here. ^^

Next is about a little boy, one of my friend from KL.Why he is so slutty recently? 3 month before this happened, he looks like normal, a very cool yet funny guy. But once I know him more, SHIT. all of his evilness come out. He start to become bitchy, slutty. He think his outfits very diva-ish, but SORRY to say, "Is not that good if put on your body." Now even worse, he let everyone knows that he is a homosexual guy. What the fuck, this does not means that you have the fame, you just own CHILDISH. Bless you. "I would not guide you anymore, just let yourself figure out the bad side of the world. whatever I said to you you never listen, so maybe I have to shut up."

The matter that killing me now is my presentation. My lecture said I raised some strong points in my presentation, so she wants me to change my slide a little bit and present it in front of 200+ people. Holy craps, how I going to overcome my nervous. I have no confident on myself no matter how much effort I put in because some of the nightmare made me that. I going to die.

HEAT~~~!!! Beyonce Knowles's personal fragment HEAT is out now. But I think is only in States but not in M'sia. I want it so much as my collection because Bee is just a diva for me.I dreamed about this perfume yesterday and I try it in my dream. Is seducing and hot that really like Beyonce / Sasha Fierce. She inspired me, bring me up and cheer me up. Recently I was listening to all of her album, from Dangerously in Love to B'Day and then I am ... Sasha Fierce, the most potential album is the 3rd one. We can see both extreme side of her. I am ... is a soft, beautiful and lovely side of her. ...Sasha Fierce is the wild, diva, Beyocilious of her. I love it very very much. That where Edan Travis and Travis Fierce come into my life... I am ... Travis Fierce.

I desperate for going gum room now. However I do not want going to UTAR's gym room. It is too funny and silly. 1) Why a gym room so cold one? It will hurt our receptors and nervous system when we sweating in a low temperature room, and easily get cold. 2) People can see from cafeteria to the gym room when they having meal down there. Is funny when I having meal down there and saw a guy or girl doing gym, DISGUSTING. 3) A lot of friends there that making me feel embarrass. 4) A lot of hunks there. I am the smallest in size one and I might be discriminated and people will roll their eyes on me.

Countdown for my final, 3 more weeks. Is a very tough time because my final is like ONE SHOT in a row. All my test is fall on one week, and within one week have to sit for one paper for each day. Stressful. I do not think I can score high because my Biology and Physics's test making me death. Hope that final wont be so hard. After that week, I am totally free, for 1 month only. Ish.

Again, recommend a song for you all. "Smash into you" by Beyonce Knowles from her 3rd multi-platinum album, I am ... Sasha Fierce. Is a very nice and meaningful song that touch and attract my heart when I first hear it , like 2 years ago. Now waiting for her brand new album, every fans of her is waiting for her 4th explosive album. Go Bee.

Untitled

2010-03-19T22:41:00.000+08:00

I hate Biology from the first page to the last page of the textbook, because it is all fact that I have to memorize the annoying and long term. Although I hate Biology, I think I am a brilliant for the chapter of cellular respiration. In order the simplest sugar called glucose converted to the energy we needed during cellular respiration, the whole process is freaking most of the course-mate's head. There are more than 20 different process by using more than 15 different enzyme to formed the by product then undergoes further modification of the organic compound to formed ATP, energy in common. We have to memorize all the process, the name of the by products and the enzyme. Is freaking out of my head currently, but as a Biology "hater", I still can remember some of the name of the process. Just give me some time for memorizing the by-product of the glucose.

By applying analogy from Critical Thinking, "Glucose is small yet complicated, how about human being?" But analogy is a weak argument because how can we compared between glucose with human being? I just make fun with what I learned. I learned how to think critically, hopefully. Now, the view in front of me is more detailed and clearer as I interpret the problems and incident more deeply and more critically. It is a good subject though. However, the lecture is so bored that always making me feel dizzy. Trying my best to stay awake in lecture but the best way is not listen to the lecture, but is to do my lab reports. LMAO. Next few weeks going to be a very tough week as all the lecture, lab report, presentation and assignment is running toward me. And Final is coming soon, I hope i am still alive that time.

Recently my networking have some conflicts. The first one is a sad conflict, one of my friend, he going to Canada in the coming May. I will miss him very much as he is my best friend since I am 7 years old. Next is a bad one, one of my friend, he said I am reluctant him. Something I want to clarify. These few day I am appearing offline due to tons of works and assignments. I seldom reply unnecessary message and I reluctant most of my friend in chat box. Sorry to said that but I am now not enough time for my assignments and I wish I can have 48 hours per day. And my emotion is not in a good mood these few day due to some personal stuff. Sorry guys. Then, a good one comes, OMG, I get my GOD's MSN finally and added me in MSN list. So f**king happy with it. Damn it, Besides, I just psycho few of my friends about personal life, outlook, and their education pathway. I can be a good adviser too. Should I study Psychology too? But is a mad job right? However all great people are crazy, I want to be great. Lolx. But, one of my babes, she is like very down these few days. I tried to get into her heart, but she not allow me to do so. I am so worry about her. She doing good now? I don't know. Hope she can let go ASAP.

I found out one very awesome song by Kelly Clarkson called "Sober" from her third album "My December". I think this song should be a single and share with her fans. The lyrics is meaningful, the melody is touching, the voice is awesome, the arrangement is good. Overall, is a big GOOD GOOD for this single, maybe would be the best song in "My December" and probably best emotion song from Kelly Clarkson and maybe best pop song of the decade. Try that song, is suit me. How about you?

Returning of Halo... (Lolx)

2010-03-18T20:57:00.000+08:00

Upon someone request
I think I have to update about myself again in this "dehydrated" blog
It's been a long time I never open up my blog account
And having my best time to blog like this
Because of UTAR
U - Univeristy
of
T - Tutorials
A - Assignments
R - Reports
Because it is end of the semester
All of my lecturers are trying their best to finish up their topic ASAP for final exam
Therefore the pity students are suffering now
Starting from this week
Every week have a test before finals come
Damn it
And next week is really killing me
Hope I can done all the UTAR soon and focus on my study

#Critical Thinking's Presentation
Should sex education introduce in school?
Think critically it's causes and effects
One may say Yes as educate the younger generation with more accurate information in sex
And one may say Yes as prevent unwanted pre-marital sex, abortion, and abandon baby in street
However one may say No as curiosity of younger generation lead to unwanted pre-marital sex, abortion and abandon baby
And one may say No as the misleading of the educator, parents, mass media and even peers
So should it?

#Who to blame actually?
I means Physics
Either Sir Issac Newton or the Apple
If Sir Issac Newton not in this world
Students "live happily ever after"
If the Apple do not drop on his head that time
We will not need to study all those kind of dynamics, force and those symbol symbol little thingy
LMAO

A moment like this and that

2010-01-18T22:37:00.000+08:00

I don't know whether is my problem or what
All the new classmate not dare to sit beside me
Or even talk to me
Maybe I dress like not in Foundation class?
Should be in Degree
Like some orientation leaders said to me earlier?
Damn it
I'm won't bite you guys or swallon you guys okay

UTAR
Is new to me
And I try my best to adapt into it
But so far I have no friends here except my high school friends
I means my classmate
And I feel bored for the 1st lecture today
Sitting alone and listen to the lesson
I start to EMO

It's strike me so sudden
Without any siren
And my mood for 1st day in UTAR spoiled
I don't know what is the fucking matter have such power
I try to think back hardly what have I done so far for 19 yrs and 19 days
Yet I still didn't get anything from my mind

Until I closed myself up in my room when I back to home
The feeling is so complicated
I know what the fuck I emo for
Is my college life in Taylor's

I do enjoy my college life in Taylor's
I learned lot of things from Taylor's
I learned how to be tough in study
I learned how to socialise with people around
I learned how to be independent
And I learned a word "Friends"

In Taylor's
I met a group of friends
An awesome group of friends
Or I called them Babes
They are important to me
I dare to say they are more important to my love one
I love them like my girlfriends

Treat me nice when I need help
Take care me when I need a accompany
Love me when I hate myself
Guide me when I am lost my way in life
Cheer me when I not happy
Warn me when I lost my behavior
Scold me when I do something out of my mind

H20 SnowFlake
Oblique MOS Poppy Library
SunwayTGV
Poker ShitHead Bluf
Alcohol

I love The Beatles' smell
Because I know I'm be with "her" that time
I love the laught
Because I know I'm be with "her" that time
I love the Dunhill King Size's smell
Because I know I'm be with "her" that time
I love the sound of playin poker
Because I know I'm be with "her" that time
I love rice
because I know I'm be with "her" that time
I love Kent 6 Mentol's smell
Because I know I'm be with "her" that time
I love the phrase of "LapSap"
because I know I'm be with "her" that time

But seem like everything is dissapear from me
I can do nothing
Begging? Impossible
And I just love them
I love you all, Babes
And now I just hope that I can get a brand new life in Kampar
God please bless me

New?

2009-12-30T19:22:00.000+08:00

Yesterday before I close my eyes under my blanket
I looking a good forward on the next day
Because the next day is a big day for me

Today when I open my eyes
I feel empty
Undescrible by word
When time goes by
The feeling become more weird
Is like taking my big day away
I don't know what blow my big day away

A brand new year for me
Means that I have to throw away the old one and welcome the new one?

Old personality to new personality?
Old schoolmate to new schoolmate?
Old friends to new friends?
I rather keep all that to make myself happier
Or I never been through the OLD matters?
I confuse

I called a friend that same birthday with me yesterday
I feel something come back to me when he answer the phone
Although we lost contact for a period of time
But the feeling not going to be weird at all
But how about them?

Anyway
Happy Birthday for myself
And thanks to those who wish me

Behind My Eyes

2009-12-07T22:00:00.001+08:00

We only have two eyes
That God gives us for observe the world
And we only can see things in front of us
We can know whats going on in front of us
But
Nothing is perfect in this world
Although we can judge which one is benefit for us
We do not know what happening behind us
That taking our advantages away or hurting us
Like the latest drama of TVB
We can't stop people for hurting us
The only thing we can do is protect ourselves

When I turn to my 180 degree
The lies cover with full of excuses
And you did it
I just get cheated
At first I really do not believe what my friends said
And at last I just get hurted
They told me everything about you
And I just believe that you won't treat me these ways
You did something that kills my heart on you
Well done
I have no comment on that
The only thing I can do now is just shut up and walk away
Last word for you are
"Love yourselves and protect yourselves."
Speechless

Learned how to protect myself
And learned how to turn my head behind
Thank you that taught me an important lesson that I never learn in classroom

Finally

2009-10-14T22:07:00.003+08:00

Just now I facebooking, I opened up my photo albums, and I wanted to change my profile picture. I scroll scroll and scroll to get a better picture. Suddenly, I feel sad and wanted to cry when I saw all those picture that took with my friends. And when the moment I saw some picture that captured in Midvalley, two tears dropped my keyboard. (Not drop on my guitar like Taylor Swift)
I don't know why, and I don't know since when the relationship changed gradually between three of us. Maybe because I'm apart in Kampar and I acn't control those situation to prevent this happen. I really don't know what's going wrong between them. I can't judge who is right or wrong because I didn't see the real incident happened in front of my eyes.
Some misunderstanding is there because of different ideas. Some lies created is to avoid quarrel. Some rude word comes in our conversation because we have to protect ourselves. But all that created the greatest misunderstanding between us.
Seems everything happened, and some crisis happened between one of them and me, I think the gaps between us will get bigger and bigger and it can't be narrowed because I not dare to face one of them, not dare to face the reason behind the crisis happened.
Hope they are doing fine there.

Tiring Day

2009-10-13T01:04:00.002+08:00

What a tiring day. Now only I can relax and sit down for blogging since wake up at 6.30am, almost 15 hours that really used up my energy. Need some time for charging or maybe change some of my "spare parts" if found some awesome parts for my not awesome part of my body. LapSap. ^^ I wish to change my eye balls to ideal one because I want to persuade my dream of becoming a pilot with Jordan. And can go to Melbourne and Vancouver where the places I wish to go in my life. ^^ But I know it is impossible. Or maybe change my face to more good looking one with bigger nose and eyes? Human is greedy, although I have good looking face, I'm still not satisfied. Always ask for more.
The moody mood still same as few days ago. What to do? Just taking my time, time will tell. I keep finding something to make me happy today, but seems everything for me are useless. Not denying, I am becoming more pessimistic. Soon will get illness if not get treatment from psychologist.
Yesterday I access to internet and searching the contact number of the University that I wanted to study next year for asking more information about Diploma and Degree of Actuarial Science. When I called the Uni just now, a malay girl picked up a phone.

Officer :"Hi, this is department of science and mathematics of University XxXxX. May I help you?" (She used Malay at first.)
Edan :"Hi, I would like to study in this Uni and I want to know more about the course of Actuarial Science."
Officer :"How can I call you? Mr?"
Edan :"Mr Chang."
Officer :"Sorry sir, we only accept Bumi."

The moment I heard the word "Bumi", means natives, I was like "Huh?". If the Uni only accept Bumi, why not the officer told me earlier when I planned all the stuff to study there? I sent some emails to the school for some of the information one moth ago, right? And why don't you tell me that this Uni only accept Malay? Really fuck off. Damn it. Malay really BOLEH, Malaysia BOLEH. Shit Head! Now I have to choose my alternatives, UTAR, but I will never change the subject, I love and want to be a professional actuary with license from SOA.

Weird Dream

2009-10-11T18:40:00.002+08:00

Yesterday before I went to bed, my mood was totally destroyed by a sms from Mr.CC. I was frustrate yet sad and I tried my best to sleep after taking my shower. However, I login to Blogger and view some of the blog that I miss it. Recently, I reading some of the post posted by Mr.W, and I enjoy reading his post about the G-Circle. Awesome, it made me smile a lot. After finish reading his blog, I went to bed.
In the morning, today's morning, when I wake up, I felt that my little Edan is wet and I thought I am peeping in night, but it's gel like liquid. DISGUSTING. Then I went to toilet to wash away the dirt, suddenly I knew that I had a dream last night, is a horny dream about Mr.W. Holy Jesus. I have no idea why he will connect with my brain and come into my dream. WEIRD!
The dream was like, he fetching me to some elsewhere after my school, and we chat quite a long in the car. We talk about our childhood, family ... Then he fetched me back to my home after the dinner in Mid Valley. Then he follow me back to my room. I bet you guys know what happen next if I am alone in house with him. Lolx. Better don't touch in so detail.
Not only that, Mr.E also went into my dream before. Should I called them sweet dream or beautiful nightmare? I don't know.
Today, no surprise, I still sad because of yesterday sms. I went to Ipoh city and accidentally meet my Jie, Joeyin. And she was shocked after I told him something that she will never think off. "Jie, I am single now." Going to meet her tonight and tell her all my sadness. Fews hour ago was my happiest time in this week, I just ate a toast that full of peanut butter. ^^ But my weight is getting higher and higher, from 55kg until 65 kg now. However, no flesh grow on my body, I hate that.
Sweet dream or Beautiful nightmare? Think of Beyonce's song. ^^

I love eating

2009-10-10T01:20:00.004+08:00

Recently I eat a lot, and I no idea that will I gain weight? I hope I will gain more flesh by eating high protein food. Last two days I went to S'pore and I had my dinner buffet in Riverview Hotel. They served five dishes first, traditional herbal soup with fish fins and abalones, fried deep roasted pork with fish belly, fresh scallop with squeeze lemon juice, and steam prawns with Chinese wine. Then I had my salad prawn, fresh salmon as appetizer. i think I ate more than 10 other dishes excluding the dessert. ^^ I love them so much. Muacksss.

Today, before I went back from canteen, I cook some sambal chili for my dinner. It's easy. You just need to blend all ingredients including red chili, paddy chili, some garlics and onions with a little bit of water. Then fry hot the pans with oil and dried shrimp until the shrimp turn brown black and take out for cooling. next put some belacan into the pans until it melts, pour the mixture of chili to the pans and cook with the belacan. Finally only put the dried shrimp into the pans and put some sugar. ^^ I enjoyed the sambal chili with curry mutton with potatoes. ^^

I miss peanut butter. I bet you all forgotten my desire on peanut butter. I wrote it somewhere in the old blog. have a look on this link, http://lalagrave1230.blogspot.com/2008/11/peanut-butter.html.

I think I gonna take good care whatever that go into my mouth. I should eat less hot and spicy food, high salt and sugar to keep my body healthy. Drink more water and I surf internet and get a recipes that really good for detoxify. Squeeze tomatoes and lemon juice and add a little bit of sugar as breakfast, then drink some plain coffee without milk or creamer to reduce eyes bag. ^^ I think I should maintain it although it just started today.

Just now turn on my patience and visit some of my blogger's friends blog. I think Willy's and Kevin's blog are interesting, feel happy to read their blog, especially the stories of G-circle by Willy and I am still reading it. ^^ And the penis one very disgusting, but I wanted to see all the photo that had been removed. So horny.

O/s: I just wrote something that really shocking in Facebook. "You can bring your boyfriends and meet me at the hotel room." Thanks for Daniel's and Eric's responds.

Randomness

2009-10-07T00:14:00.002+08:00

Hoping my friend can get me the ticket for Beyonce's concert in Malaysia. Sob. It's on 25 of Oct and I not free on 26 of Oct, very rush for me if I really going to the party. Maybe next time?
My sister just bought me a toy thou I'm not a kid. I really love it because it's really cute. Hehe, is SpongeBob friend's, Patrick, but I wanted SpongeBob for long time ago.
Recently, one of my friend called me. One of my dearest friend's brother and grandfather just passed away. I heartache when I heard this news from him. Somemore he told me that Ben cried in his car after they meet up in somewhere. Hope he is fine now. Wish his brother and grandfather can guided by an angle.
I going to S'pore tomorrow for 3 days. And I packing my stuff. (A lot, don't know bring what bag along.) Planning to buy a fake hair for my sister and myself. Maybe buy Lady Gaga's hair, can wear to MP or Oblique. Lolx. Sure I'm not dare.
Just now looked at the moon. Some weird illusion happen on the outer part of the moon. I didn't capture with my camera so can't tell so detail. The outer part of the moon surrounded by a yellow-ring shaped light, very beautiful.
After allowing myself to calm down, I'm still can't forgive myself as a betrayal. Hope everything is okay there.
Do you know Aleo Vera gel has many usage? As a shaving gel, on blemishes. And as hair styling gel. Lolx... Unbelievable, gonna to try it later. So how do you use aloe vera gel?

Get your ass off out of the issue

2009-10-03T00:31:00.002+08:00

When the news of Beyonce's "I am... Tour" Live in Malaysia spread last month, I think, all of music lover in M'sia was totally crazy for it. I am so happy if my friend can get me the tickets for the VVIP for the concert. I including Knowles's fans waited the chance for almost 2 years since last tour "The Experience Tour" had canceled because of the dress code set at here. (I hate those dress code)
Now, the gang, I don't want to mention the name, just name it as, closed-minded people, CMP as in short form, they raised their voice to cancel the concert AGAIN. WTH. Totally fuck and ass hole holy Jesus. They said Beyonce's costume is sexy, that I totally agree. However as a performer, they should bring out their best, best voice, best dance, best costume and best body shape, as well as Beyonce. If CMP can't accept the sexiest of foreign people, why they still playing all the sexy music video in media? Why still Lady Gaga's swim-suit that showed whole legs and Beyonce's Sasha Fierce costume that semi-covered her boobs and why PussyCatDolls' video still playing in media with most sexy dancing move? Should they banned all the video that over their limit that set previously by them? (Some more, they said Avril Lavigne wearing sexy costume. Which part of AL sexy? I wondering and searching a part of her concert to make myself high. Lolx!?)
If they don't want see the concert because of too sexy, don't go fpr the concert. The concert is open for everyone but only for those who can accept the sexiest of Beyonce, no one force you to go. Excuse me, be open-minded, Hole-ing. Sit on your sofa and watching those programs that never ever pollute your mind, or sleep on your bed, don't ever bother the concert that people waited for years.
Her songs were inspired a lot of people especially girls. Teach them how to love, how to live their life and boys as well. Just let her inspire us again.
Don't ever raised those meaningless problems that will cause few thousand people hate you all. Just let the music lover enjoy the show. If one man cut the barrage, a thousand people fell into river!

Still Healing

2009-09-29T22:38:00.003+08:00

A song that can only represent my feeling now, "Better In Time". Lewis really touch my heart and sing out loud of my sadness for this hardest period after incident happened.

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's going to hurt when it heals too
(It'll all get better in time)
Even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile because I deserve too
(It'll all get better in time)

I'm still healing too. And I just keep all the memories in my bottom of my broken heart, never share with others to reduce my sadness. Maybe we, including outsiders never ever think about the relationship was ended so fast and so sudden, but I deserve the all the pain too because I done something that shouldn't be done. Betraying spoils the whole thing. Maybe it's called Karma. I do not really know whats I'm thinking now, and I trying to be stronger and stronger.

Hit me like the ray of Sun
Going through my darkest night
You're the only I wanted
You gonna addicted to the light
I swear never fall agian
This don't even feel the falling
Gravity can't forget
To pull me back to the ground again

Beyonce drop her tear when she singing "Halo" in the live performance of 2009 NAACP Image Award. Knowles written this song is dedicated for her dearest, Mr Jay-Z. Although in love, going through the sweetest part of relationship, don't ever forget the "gravity", it will "pull you back to the ground again". Hero to Zero. Maybe I took the wrong steps and everything become different. Never thought that the "full stop" placed so no peacefully.
But since the decision had made and I think just let the decision go. Follow the heart, I think time will tell whether the wound healed.
Suddenly love Rihanna's "Take a bow", especially these few sentences in the lyrics.

But it's over now
Go on and take a bow

and

And the award for best liar goes to you

I'm the greatest liar.
Still healing.

Repeat Made Perfect

2009-09-29T00:10:00.001+08:00

My mind pop out something that really Random and I woulkd like to share with people. Just now went to toilet with my headphone, I realized something. Do you know why Lady Gaga's "Just dance" and "Poker face" can become the hits for '09? The reason behind it is REPEAT REPEAT and REPEAT.

Can't read my, can't read my
No he can't read my poker face
Can't read my, can't read my
No he can't read my poker face
Pa pa pa poker face, Pa pa poker face
Pa pa pa poker face, Pa pa poker face

The whole chorus for "Poker face" is just repeating the same sentences. Lolx. The last part of the song even worse, repeat for almost 6 times. What the heck! Gaga, will you sing the wrong part or miss one part when you singing live?
After know this funny facts, I just tune to "Just dance". Same story, Holy Shit! Maybe Gaga repeating the chorus is to made people easier to remember the song. But somehow Gaga's song not only using that technique, she also using the techno that heavy on the beat to make people can dance with the music, example Gaga's "Love Game".

Beyonce's "Single Ladies" also very awesome. Using heavy beats and repeating sentences that helped Beyonce's holding the awards of Song Of The Year in VMA '09. Maybe I have to thanks Britney. Random? Because the technique is from the single "Womanizer" by Spears. Can you count how many "Womanizer" appear in that song? more than 30 times. Haha.

Repeat made perfect. Yeah!

Randomness

2009-09-27T23:05:00.003+08:00

Don't know why these few days I received a lot of anonymous' calls and sms. What the fuck, they trying to know about me but never let me know his and her name. What the heck. Where did they get my number from? One of them said get my number from Maxis' Friend Finder. Excuse me, I using Digi's line, not Maxis. Hate them. I trying to get their info, but they just keeping their "mouth" shut. Holy Shit! (Mr K.C.Cheong). Someone help me to stop them, they just annoying for me. One guy name Selvester Stallone, he just a bull-shit. When I say I am male, he stopped the conversation. "I though you are not a boy". "How I know whether you get the number correctly from Maxis? Wrong question" I replied, then he stopped. Lolx.

Sharing and caring are important for holding relationship. However I hate those people that no willing to share his or her sadness and happiness with his or her couple. What the hack? Can you treat him better? Although working from morning till evening, at least a call or sms a day can make him happy. Treat him better okay? If not I will "tampar" your face with my size 10 Converse shoes.

If I were a boy
I think I couldn't understand
How to feel to love a girl
I swear be a better man

Who can sponsor me to go to Beyonce's "I am ..." World Tour in Malaysia at 25 of September at Bukit Jalil Stadium? Please...

All the single ladies
Now put your hands up

Going to oversea soon, the so-called "Holidays" allow men to rest. Lolx. Planning to buy some Mooncakes for my mother at there. I miss her. Happy Mooncakes Festival. ^^

Please Forgive Me

2009-09-20T01:54:00.003+08:00

To someone or maybe a group of people that really upset on me, I really sorry for what have I done to hurt someone that you all love too. I know I am very stupid and selfish to avoid all problems by leaving it behind. I know what have I done to made you all to hate me or maybe to "delete" me from yours memories. But I have to say sorry. Not only for the one I am hurting but also to all of you that looking good on this relationship. I willing to accept all of your bad perceptions on me and I know I deserve it for what have I done. Sorry, I am not dare to face you all. Please give me some time and time will tell because I know you all are really piss on me. Sorry.

Something I can't change

2009-07-04T00:07:00.002+08:00

5 weeks
I am not around
And within this period
So many Thing can be done
Prom and Club
H2O and Uncle Seng
And the first week of August
I can't appear myself in a lot of activities
Especially can't be with someone in some day

Sometimes we have do something that we not like or not willing to do
But we have to follow them
After next few months I have to start everything over again
I have to leave where am I now
To somewhere where I suppose to be in
Although I not happy with the changes
Because of something and someones I can't bear to leave
I have to do so
To someone that I love out there
Sometimes we have to let go something in your life to go further in your life

I believe in Karma
If you do something good
You will get back the same good thing or value
And thanks God
Finally revenges fall on that two road-side bitches
Or I call them Slut?
Either

Welcome to The Grave of Halo

2009-06-17T01:55:00.004+08:00

Seriously
I need to appreciate you guys a lot
And
Sorry
For moving from the old dusty blog to this brand new blog
Grave Of Halo

Hey
Please change the link
OK?

Lets talk about the blog
Why Grave of Halo?
Grave = Die
Halo = Alive
When Die and Alive "crash" together
What is it?
By using integration and differentiation
By using statistic and probability
By using whatever method
The answer for the equation
Grave + Halo or Die + Halo is "I Don't Know"
I really dont know
Just being random

Maybe I admire Beyonce?
I dont know
I think Beyonce much hotter than everyone else
Beyonce K.O.ed Britney Spears and Lady Gaga even the Grammy Award Winner , "Big" Mariah Carey
She just Hot Sexy and whatever
I am ... Sasha Fierce

Why is Big Mariah Carey?
She has "Big" voice, "Big" Lungs, "Big" Sales Record and "Big" Boobs
Lolx

Grave or Halo?
Tonight I will be Halo
*Halo means Happy
*Grave means Emo